Thursday, April 26, 2012

Foodie Quickie @ Solea - Appleton WI

Solea on Urbanspoon
The apparent bastard child of an illegal Mexican and a Polish immigrant, Solea delivers a bland selection of nondescript food lacking in personality, flavor, and distinction that evokes anyone with a pallet, not made of wood and stacked in a rodent infested warehouse, to cry out in pain and wonder if they had somehow traveled back to their infancy glued in to an out-of-date car seat strapped to a Flux Capacitor and were, in fact, eating an old jar of Gerber Squash (have you ever tried that stuff? Ewe!). Whereas, the Mexican side of the equation works hard to fill your need for sustenance with beans, rice and meat but forgot to bring the cumin along for good measure, the Polish side just sits there and wonders what to do and why their friendly one-armed cousin just fell out of a tree! The lack of flavor left my own pallet feeling lonely and completely disregarded by the entire student body . . . just like Jr. high school gym class. 


  1. I hope you get paid by the word, because you just babbled a whole paragraph of rhetoric and garbage like I've never read before. I think maybe you need to stick to attempts at a failed career as a walmart greeter than be a "food critic" The food is well made and portions are ample for the price. Try again, maybe even leave out the racism, for Mexican and Polish people alike.

    1. LOL! I do this for fun and enjoy reading the constructive criticism (like yours!) and I would encourage you to read some of my other reviews and comment on them as well. I sincerely appreciate your comment, I truly do. I also appreciate your lack of taste buds, originality and love for poorly attempted ethnic cuisine. It is obvious that your inaptitude to discern between inedible garbage and actual food, stems from your crowning achievement as the only individual with the unique physiology to wear a demitasse like a sombrero. (look it up)